I like to show the happy. To write about seconds that mattered. Moments that crept up on us and became exceptional. The little giggles shoved in-between the big hullabaloo. I want to be able to look back someday, and not just be left with a vague recollection of it all but concrete proof of our journey.
Swirled in between all of these wonderful moments, mixing effortlessly are struggles, hard times and every now and again a plain old bad day. I want to remember these times also, to retain an honest sense of it all. This week has been just that, a struggle, with a couple bad days thrown in for good measure!
Homeschooling started off so well, everyone was excited and we genuinely enjoyed it. This week has ended in tears and me questioning near all my decisions and know how.
Figuring out what direction to take the farm in, truly examining what we want and more important how to get there- has been hanging over Kaleb and I like a thick fog. It feels like we are fighting our way thru it blindly only to end up right back where we began.
Combine it with all your other basic mayhem and I am left bone weary.
It's a brief minute, and I know that. Time to let go of the unknowns, of what I think should happen and live in what is. Because what is. . . is pretty great.
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