Senin, 23 Februari 2015

Ramblings of a Scared Heart



If I thought that Thursday was a rough day, I was about to be given a serious lesson in perspective. 

I woke up on Friday morning, feeling lighter. My demeanor back to it's sunny, happy self. There was freezing rain coming down outside, slowly hitting our tin roof and bouncing and bumping it's way to the cold ground beneath. It was a stay in your pajamas and snuggle kind of day. A day that whispers gently for you to be still, slow way down and savor in it's ease. So that's just what we did. . .

and then in a brief moment it shifted. 

Suddenly I found myself on the phone with an ER doctor telling me he was with my dad- who was, I would find out, in the midst of a major heart attack. Helicopters weren't flying due to weather so they would be rushing him to Little Rock ASAP.

I couldn't make sense of it. My Dad? My Dad? It wasn't feasible- he is the epitome of health. He is my rock and I am his baby girl, how could this be happening.

To say that it was a whirlwind from that moment on would be a gross understatement, yet somehow intertwined thru it seamlessly was also a great sense of peace. Everyone came together, we claimed our roles and we made it. He is doing so much better, and I think we can all say  that we are grateful it happened. Now we are aware of his hearts shortcomings and will have a much better chance of prevention in the future.

Things are still a little crazy right now, and my hands are a bit full at the moment,  but even in this- I feel so wholly blessed. My Dad is going to be ok. My husband is completely and unbelievably the love of my life- always strong, always stable, doing everything that can possibly be done to make it easier on us all. My best friend drove three hours to pick me up by eight in the morning. She drove me to the hospital and stayed with me and my dad until family could get there that afternoon- I can't say that I was surprised, that's who she is, but I was honored. And then there were my beautiful kiddos- untouched by sadness and fear, always thinking about themselves in the most comforting of ways. They have a skill of carrying normalcy with them, pulling everything back down to reality- a trait I have never been more thankful for. 

It's the unknown of incidents like this that leave everyone  coming together- grasping for the ones you love. It leads to more smooches and tighter hugs and has an inherent way of breaking down walls that sadly, have been built as we've grown up. 

Anyway, I'm not sure how to end this- It was just an account for me to remember, a place to seek the good, and also to tell you all where I've been. You, my friends, have come to mean so much to me and your prayers and support would be invaluable.

p.s.- I have not taken any pictures in days, my mind is not really kicking out the creativity and I have no post at the ready- so if there is a topic that intrigues you or a question you would like answered, leave it in the comments- and if given a free moment this week, I can work from there.     




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