Teeth Meat

That's right, I said teeth meat.
Photo: Pam Roth

Whilst I am on the subject of teeth (hop over to Expat Life with a Double Buggy for more on wobbly teeth and tooth fairies) I'd like to share my distaste with you of gums. Not about actual gums (not that gums are particularly pleasant - google gums and choose images and you'll quickly see what I mean) but about the Dutch word for gums. You know, the more I type the word gums (and hence read it in my head) the weirder a word it sounds. Gums.

Anyway, I digress. The word for gums in Dutch is tandvlees. A literal translation for that is 'teeth meat'.  If that isn't a word that conjures up horror films then I don't know what is.

The Iron Lady

Margaret Thatcher has managed to be as controversial in her passing as during her time as prime minister. Her death also reminded me of a very common language mistake the Dutch make when they speak English, that being the pronunciation of the word iron. It's not a word that you need to use very often in a second language but with the media full of "The Iron Lady" it is a word that is being flung around on every TV news channel in the Netherlands.

The Dutch say "I - RON". In English it is pronounced "IYUN". Obviously I can see why non-natives wouldn't say it right. How we English say it has no actual relation to how it is spelt. But that is the way it is.

For years I have battled with my Dutch husband to get him to say iron the right way. It's been tough. And now everywhere I turn I hear "I - RON". The pinnacle was when I heard Sacha de Boer say "iron lady" in a way only the Dutch can.

So, it's not logical, or phonetic. But it is how it's said. I can only imagine there is a herd of English teachers in Dutch schools spreading this mispronunciation on a nationwide basis, from generation to generation. It's our job, as English native speakers, to give the word iron its dignity back. "IYUN". Shout it out - IYUN.

I know there are lots of words that don't make sense in the English language. I also know my pronunciation of some Dutch words leaves a lot to be desired but the thing about the word iron is that it is said wrong on a nationwide scale. How can that be? Where does this pronunciation come from in the Netherlands? I have one thing left to say - "IYUN".

Right, I'm off to start battling with Sacha de Boer.....

Are there other words that are misspoken on a national basis? Are there notorious words in other languages that are mispronounced by other nations? 

Dutch Difficulty

There is (at least) one word in the Dutch language that still eludes me. It's a word that I just can't quite my tongue round. It's a word I'll avoid saying if at all possible.

That place hard for expats to say...
Photo: (c) Amanda van Mulligen

The list of impossible words was, of course, once quite long. The Dutch language is not the easiest for a British person to pronounce. There are lots of throaty sounds which don't exist in the English language.

When I first came to the Netherlands I lived temporarily in a place called Voorschoten. Thankfully it was only for a few months because I really couldn't pronounce it properly in those early days. It's the "sch" part that caused issues. The same sound is the culprit when non-Dutch visitors are trying to say Scheveningen. It took a while, but I did eventually master the guttural sound.

Non-Dutch speakers should avoid "Uitgang"
Photo: (c) Amanda van Mulligen

Ui (the Dutch word for onion) was the other word that I avoided if I could, simple enough if you refuse to talk about food. That meant I also couldn't talk about leaving the house (uitgaan) or about exits (uitgang). But I got over those hurdles.

However, one word remains. It sits as a solitary, lonely word on my 'impossible to say' list. It glares at me, sits there with an evil smile, daring me to make a fool of myself, challenging me to find an alternative way of saying it.

Difficulty. I have difficulty with the Dutch word for difficulty. Moeite. There, I've said it out loud. Faced my Dutch demon but alas, I still can't say it like a native.

What word eludes you in your host country language? Why?

What If I Had Never Left England?

On my "Expat Life with a Double Buggy" blog I published a post which pondered how different life would have been for my three boys had they been born and raised so far in England, instead of the Netherlands. It got me thinking about myself.....

What would my life look like now if I had not moved to the Netherlands in 2000?

I am pretty sure I wouldn't have taken the plunge into a writing career. I can imagine I would be plodding along in a Human Resources career in an office environment that sucked the life out of me. Becoming an expat gave me an angle and an inspiration to write that life in Watford just didn't give me. That aside, a move to England would have mean retraining for my husband and a serious career set back for him so money not passion would have been my number one concern for many years.

Harry the Hornet - The Watford Footcall Club Mascot
Photo: Watford Ladies FC

Talking of Watford, one thing I would still be doing had I stayed there is sitting every other week with thousands of others in Vicarage Road, home of the mighty (cough) Hornets. That's Watford football club to those unfamiliar with the red and yellow of the 'Orns...... I was a season ticket holder for a looooooong time and it was a wrench to give that up!

Where would I be living now had my husband and I decided that life in England was the way forward and he had moved there instead of me making the move across the North Sea? A question I can't even imagine to answer! Back to a place I grew up in like Rickmansworth or Croxley Green? Near where my dad now lives? It would have to be within the catchment area of the school we wanted our boys to attend.....

My social life would certainly have been richer (it's no secret that getting friendly with the locals in the Netherlands is a challenge in itself) over the last decade. The relationship with my mother may not have crumbled had I stayed living nearby. I would certainly have seen my extended family, particularly my wonderful grandparents, more often than now.

The big things in life would be so different to now - but the little things too.

I would still be consuming Guinness in the family orientated pubs that grace British high streets. Eating Indian meals would have remained a regular pastime and fish and chip suppers would have been commonplace. I would probably still be consuming Nik Nak and Wheat Crunchies crisps (do they still exist?).

I wouldn't be able to utter a word of Dutch.

I would have probably been driving a car around the English roads without a shred of fear (a blog post to come about this real soon).

Any new TV may have been purchased in the local supermarket instead of online or the local electronics shop. I would be buying my hair gel in the local Superdrug or Boots (my jaw just dropped when I googled Boots a Dutch site appeared..... online Boots for the Netherlands and a chemist in the Hague??!!! How did that happen without my knowledge?) and my magazines from WH Smiths (where in a former life I did a stint working on the pen counter).

Who know's how life would have looked but once thing is for sure - it would all look so different to life now!!

How would your life look now if you had not moved abroad?

One or Two Languages?

Is the Dutch language
suffering because of
bilingualism?

Following a Radio Netherlands Worldwide article about bilingualism in kids I wrote a blog post on Life with a Double Buggy. The conversation and discussion has been popular on Twitter and on the blog - the short version is that the article reported that the Dutch consultatiebureaus advise parents to teach their children open language only - and therefore do not encourage bilingualism in children here. This goes completely against my own experiences - and that of many others.

Want to join in or read more? Pop over to Life with a Double Buggy and let us know about your experiences. For those in other countries, what do you think about teaching your children two or more languages? 

Crikey, That Snail's Got No Clothes On

A Naked Snail Photo: Antonio Garcia

I was pushing my one year old in his pram whilst my four year was jumping over puddles on the pavement next to us on our way back to infant school after lunch. The heavens had opened that morning and the rain had been continuous since I had done the first school run of the day that morning. In front of us was a mother with a four year old girl dressed from head to toe in pink in one hand and her slightly older brother in the other hand. Suddenly the trip stopped before us and the young girl let out a shriek,

"Ew. Wat is dat mama?" she asked, turning to her mother. She pointed at the ground to a slug.

"Dat is een naaktslak," said her mother laughing. The Dutch word for slug, naaktslak, litterally translates to naked snail. Both children were now laughing. The young boy said,

"Yes, he woke up this morning and forgot to put his clothes on." His little sister giggled. As did I. My four year old looked up at me,

"Nee, toch mama?" he asked, questioning the validity of the boy's statement. The mother continued,

"Yes, he must have been very confused when he woke this morning."

It reminded me just how fabulous the Dutch language can be!

The Expat Unfriendly Netherlands

Hard to make friends, difficult to learn the local language, fit into the local culture and integrate into the local community. Does this sound like your expat life in the Netherlands?

According to the Expat Explorer Survey carried out for HSBC Bank International the Netherlands placed last out of 25 countries, making it the most expat unfriendly country you could hope for.

Only 36% of expats relocating to the Netherlands find it easy to make friends here and 55% have concerns about the barriers that the local language put up. According to the survey, expats find the Dutch culture hard to fit in to and integrating in to the local community is far from easy here.

The difficulty of making friends in the Netherlands, particularly with the locals, is a common expat forum topic. Learning the language is a common talking point too but for the Netherlands to score so badly on these points did surprise me.

On the other hand, I did feel like shouting  "You see!" to someone who once posted a comment on an article I wrote for the Telegraph. A reader going by the name of "Kingory" commented,

"The Netherlands is about the easiest place in the world to be an expat, the language is really easy if you can hack the pronunciation, English is widely spoken, less than an hour east of London, there are loads of expats there already, and they even have the UK BBC for God's sake!!

Kind of missing the point about trying to integrate I think, but nonetheless you would think that a move to a far flung destination would be tougher than a move to a Western European country.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Have you experienced problems getting your social life on track after moving to the Netherlands? Is the culture too much to adapt to? Do the survey results surprise you or confirm your feelings?

Learning Dutch - a Tip or Two

Gerrie Soede of Poldertaal

For my last Expats@Home newsletter I interviewed Gerrie Soede, a Dutch language tutor in The Hague, to get her viewpoint on the best way to learn a foreign language and of course she gave me some tips for those learning Dutch in particular.

The good news is that, given the right circumstances (and a bit of talent), you could be fluent in Dutch in three years. The bad news is that for some people fluency is something that will never be achieved. However, don't let that be a deterrent if you don't have a natural flair for languages. Gerrie says,

"Don’t give up trying and remember that communication is always more important than perfection. Learning the local language is important to feel at home and expand opportunities."

I asked her what the most difficult thing about learning Dutch is. Here's her response,

"That depends on your level. At each higher level you’ll meet other difficult things. The articles and verbs at level A1; structure of the sentences at level A2 and B1, combination of words later on."

In terms of good resources to learn Dutch? Gerrie is clear that you each student should have an idea about their own learning preferences and what works for them. She explains,

"You need to choose resources that meet your learning style and your goals. And that’s different for any individual. However, I like Code and De Delftse Methode for the first levels of learning Dutch."

To round up, here are some tips from Gerrie to help those of us in a constant state of Dutch language learning:

• Invest not only in reading but pay attention to listening 
• Dare to make mistakes 
• Invest in learning words and do not think that grammar is the most important
• Stop the locals talking English to you by telling them you don’t speak English..... no, seriously -  explain you want to practice
• Stop translating as fast as possible
• Meet native speakers as soon as possible

Most of all, Gerrie explains that it is vital to consider the fact that you are communicating as more important that getting it right all the time. Accept that you’re probably not perfect and you'll feel much more relaxed about learning Dutch.

The Ins and Outs of Expat Careers: From Human Resources to Writing

This is the first post in the series about expat careers. To kick off the series I thought I would share my expat career experience with you.......

I moved from the UK to the Netherlands in 2000 and at the time I was a Human Resources (HR) professional. I had studied for a Post Graduate Diploma in HR Management and intended to continue practicing HR when I moved abroad.

Within two months I had a new job with a large international company in a HR role. But to start earning again I’d made many compromises. The position was lower than my UK role was, the salary less. It was a temporary role and working through an employment agency.

Despite the number of international companies based in the Randstad in the Netherlands I found that the job market for my niche was relatively small because my Dutch was nowhere near good enough to work in a Dutch company – and that reduced my options considerably.

Feeling insignificant in a big
office block
Photo: Ryan Smart

After years of working on a specific contract in the same company, having been given a permanent, direct contract with the company the project came to an end and I was moved within the organisation to another team. It went downhill from there.  I felt like a number not a valued team member, a face in the crowd. I started reviewing my career options. I needed creativity in my daily work life. I wanted to write for a living but didn’t really see how.

I considered how I could combine HR and writing and then I discovered Jo Parfitt and attended one of her courses. It was the springboard that took my career on a new direction. During the course, Jo made a general statement to the group which stuck with me,

“You can make a career of writing and you can earn well with it. But you need to be passionate about what you are doing.”

I knew I wasn’t passionate about HR anymore. It hadn’t fulfilled any of the hopes I’d had, especially for much of my time in the Netherlands. But I was passionate about writing.

When I went on maternity leave it was the opportunity to take stock and make the change. I never went back to my HR role nor the international company. I set up The Writing Well instead.

The main barrier was financial but my departure from my former HR position left me financially secure for a number of months so I had a safety net – plus the income provided by my husband’s role gave us enough security to support the inevitable drought times.

Setting up a business in the Netherlands turned out to be straight forward, particularly given the nature of my company. I visited my local Kamer van Koophandel (Chamber of Commerce) to register The Writing Well and then registered the company with the Dutch tax office. That was the administration taken care of.

I undertook a web design course with NTI so I was able to design and build my own website for the launch of The Writing Well. And then I began networking and producing articles for various expat websites and publications – for free.


It built up my name and portfolio and then paid work started to steadily flow in.

A while after I started writing, I started a distance learning course at the London School of Journalism to boost my professional skills and keep my personal development going.

For expats wanting to make a move into the world of writing, my advice is this:  choose a niche, know your market and grow your networks.

Working virtually is vital if writing is your chosen
expat career.  Photo: Maripepa

Grow a platform for yourself (or as Anastasia Ashman and Tara Agacayak call it – a global niche). Writing is a great expat career because it is portable. Your clients can live across the other side of the world and it makes no difference so long as you can work virtually in an effective manner. I would also add that you should make the most of distance learning courses.

You do need the support of those around you. My husband enables me to take the time to disappear into my home office and work because he takes on the household and looking after the children. He has motivated and supported me from day one and even before – and takes an active role in decisions I make, and activities I undertake relating to my business. Jo Parfitt has also been a great support over the years – somebody who remembers her network at every possible chance and points clients in the right direction.

To succeed in a career overseas I think you need to be able to effectively network, both virtually and face to face. You need to be passionate about what you are doing and it certainly helps to be creative – to think outside the box. Finally - believe in yourself.

• Useful links for an overseas career in writing:

www.joparfitt.com
London School of Journalism

• Here are just some of the websites that welcome articles which enable you to build a portfolio - 

www.expatica.com

www.expatarrivals.com

www.iamexpat.com

www.expatwomen.com

www.expatexchange.com

And for inspiration to build a creative career doing what you love, no matter where you are visit Tara Agacayak's site - Turquoise Poppy.


Next week Louise Wiles shares her expat career story.

Two Dutch Signs

On my travels around my local areas I regularly see two signs with sayings on them which are worth sharing because they amuse me. They actually only really work in Dutch so this is really a post for the Dutch speakers out there.

Photo: An "Eikel"  

Wij houden van je hond maar niet van z'n stront - a polite way of saying please don't let your dog foul here.  Believe me its a huge problem here but nice to see someone trying to tackle it in a civilised way.

And my favourite is this as text on a licence plate:

Je hoeft niet in een boom te hangen om een eikel te zijn - for non-Dutch speakers it's a play on words. Eikel means acorn in Dutch, but it also means idiot (put nicely) so it means you don't have to hang in a tree to be an 'eikel'. Trust me, it works in Dutch....

Book Review: Nederlands English by Alison O'Dornan

A Book for Teaching Bilingual
Children the Alphabet

When I was teaching my eldest son the alphabet I faced a problem that only parents of bilingual children face - the fact that the traditional objects used for each letter don't match in both English and Dutch. What I mean is this:

A is for apple (EN) and appel (NL)
B is for ball (EN) and bal (NL)
C is for cat (EN) and oh.... kat (NL).....

For each letter I drew the object and until I hit C, it was working a charm. At such a young age trying to explain that cat in English is spelt differently to kat in Dutch is difficult to say the least, if not impossible. In fact, there aren't a huge array of typical Dutch words to use for teaching toddlers the alphabet. Finding something that worked in English and Dutch was hard. And I had only reached C.......

"Learning the alphabet in a second language is much easier when the words start with the same letter in both languages" reads the back of Alison O'Dornan's book "Nederlands English". Which, I think, was my thought process a few years ago when I started with my son. This book would have made that process a lot  easier.

I'll let Alison explain how this book came in to being,

"The initial idea was inspired by a young Dutch mother living in the UK, who found it confusing to read either Dutch or English alphabet books with her one year old daughter. At the age of one, children do not distinguish between the two languages but simply learn that an object has two different sounds associated with it.  Hence as they start to learn to recognise letters by associating their shape with a sound, it is important that the item depicted matches the sound of the letter.  So if a child is shown an English alphabet book where “K” is often represented by a picture of a ‘Kite’, then this would be very confusing as it should be “V” for ‘Vlieger’ in Dutch, a very different sound. By carefully picking the objects that we have used for our ABC book we have eliminated this confusion."

The book itself is nicely laid out with the English word and a sentence at the top of the page, a picture of the object in the middle and the Dutch word and text at the bottom of the page. It's the first book in what will be a series with other languages.

It's a great concept and as far as I know it is quite unique. If you're teaching your children a second language from an early age this is a great resource to have. The book is currently being revised and teh new version will be available in the spring - it's worth waiting for the updated edition for an improved read with your children.

For more information and a peek inside the Dutch/English book visit www.Diglotbooks.com

"Komt Een Vrouw bij de Dokter" - The Book

As I crept in to bed sniffing and snottering my husband asked,

"Finished your book then?"

Yes I had. I had just turned the final page over of 'Komt een Vrouw bij de Dokter' written by Kluun (aka Raymond van de Klundert). This is Kluun's debut novel written in 2003 and is dramatised from events in his own life.

It's a funny thing to enjoy a book which evokes gut wrenching tears but enjoy it I did. Well, when I say enjoy... I mean I found it hard to put down, I emphasised with the characters and I experienced their pain. That's what a good book should do right - put you into someone else's world?

When I woke the next morning I had puffed up red eyes and I was glad the book was finished. Myrna Goossen (Aperitivo) sums it up perfectly, "Man, man, wat een heftig book."

Komt een vrouw bij de doktor is a book about Stijn and Carmen living in Amsterdam in the prime of their life, both running their own companies, enjoying the night life of the Dutch capital city, surrounded by success and friends. Until they are struck by breast cancer.

This book is their journey through cancer, about how it rips at the heart of their family and confronts her close friends. It is written from the perspective of Stijn, a fun loving, philandering, emotionally challenged husband as he faces up to the reality that his wife is terminally ill. It is a book about preparing for the end, an ode to love and the strength of family. The book is a roller coaster of emotion from anger at the medical establishment, to hope brought by treatment options, desperation as the effects of chemo take hold, to the final realisation that Carmen won't see their young daughter, Luna grow up. It is a heart wrenching read, and all the more because it is based on real events.

Be prepared for humour and tears.

For those whose Dutch is in progress..... the book is available in English with the title "Love Life" by Ray Kluun. It has also been made into a very successful film of the same title starring Carice van Houten, Barry Atsma and Pierre Bokma. You can see the trailer on zie.nl.

A book sequel entitled "Widower" is also available (though I am yet to read it but it is on my reading list for sure).

Mama and Papa or Mummy and Daddy?

Photo: Dirk Herrmann

An interesting post caught my eye on the networking site Insego this week. A member asked if other parents preferred to be called mama or papa, like the Dutch use, or whether other expats preferred to use the terms of their native language - so in my case mummy and daddy. It struck a chord because it is something I have thought about since becoming a parent.

I speak English to my sons. The idea is that they speak (and in the case of my youngest, will speak) English back to me. However, my eldest calls me mama, which is what he learnt to call me from me and his 'papa'. I never really thought anything of the term mama, nor particularly consciously decided on mama instead of mummy, until one day my son called me mummy. And it felt weird. it somehow did not fit.

He had called me mama since the day he could talk and after an extended trip to the UK, he came out suddenly with mummy. I didn't react instantly because it took a second to realise he was actually addressing me. I corrected him with "mama" and he looked confused. Everyone else in England had used mummy when referring to me - "Shall we see if your mummy wants to do that?" "Maybe ask your mummy before you eat that." So he had adopted it and begun using it back in Holland. To my dismay. And I still am not sure, even now, why it dismayed me. But it did. And he now, generally, calls me mama. Every now and then he reverts to mummy but it is so infrequent it doesn't bother me.

I think I got used to hearing mama from him so when he used mummy it sounded alien. However, there is also another part that prefers mama because it reminds me of who we are as a family. My children are Dutch and no matter what my nationality is, they are currently more Dutch than English. And so, somehow, it seems more natural for them to call me mama.

What do your children call you? Do you use terms from your host or birth country?